it's been a while. again.
it's week two of my senior year.
i might lose my thoughts so i'm going to go straight into it.
it was never about us.
it's not about us doing...us trying to feel, to get close to God.
it's about our hearts..the true desires of our hearts, souls, and minds...and God does the rest.
He is always at work. He will do the work.
today, my class drilled into my head that in our society, wealth = health.
how terribly sad, yet how terribly true.
social inequalities = health inequalities.
that is why there is a heaven ya'll.
that is why there is a Savior ya'll.
Jesus, You truly are our only Hope.
Thank You.
without faith, it is impossible to please God.
even if you think it's ridiculous, or you have no clue what's going to happen...or have no sense of right or wrong or whatever, if you place your faith in God..He looks at the heart...and always works for the good of those who love Him.
it's not having faith in your decision, but having faith in God with whatever decision...because your faith in Him surpasses any decision. your decision to place your faith in Him is the ultimate decision...and it's what He wants...to always activate and practice and remember our faith.
He tells us to rejoice because we really do have every reason to rejoice, always.
even when the world sucks and will continue to suck.
because that's exactly why He died for us. so we can rejoice even in these hard times, because He is our Joy..He is our Hope.
He tells us to ask as if we have received...because we have received already. if we have Jesus, we have everything. if we have faith, God will always provide in His perfect timing. His timing is truly perfect, and no one knows but Him.
so again, have faith in Him.
when i say Lord, i want to be like you.
He says.....you already are.
when i say Lord, make me holy. i want to be holy.
He says, ...you already are.
when i say Lord, help me, guide me.
He says.....i'm here. i was always here. i live in you.
when i say Lord, give me faith.
He says.....believe, and you will see...
God has already given us everything.....
everything...
oh...if we could only have faith to believe and seee.......
Jesus...i believe and want to believe and follow You all the days of my life.....
i think these were all the thoughts in my head before showering.
now, clean and fresh, i will begin my hw.
thank You, Jesus.
for my room....my fingers....my blog...my family....clean air....clean showers...clean water...
You are good.....apart from You, there is no good.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Thursday, June 9, 2011
4:14
God is good.
there is no reason, no way, no how...i'm still awake..still surviving this week.
i am experiencing major grace.
i found a good study spot today at norris...and i constantly had to remind myself that God was with me..that God was for me...and studying became a lot more enjoyable.
i had a short time of prayer and reflection...and wrote this behind my stats notes.
i plan to throw away all my stats notes, so i want to copy this down here.
and as i'm reminded of the thoughts that i believe God whispered to me...i will prepare my heart to speed-write this spanish essay. ahhh. i cannot wait until 2 o'clock.
at norris, wednesday afternoon:
Lord,
it's 4:14
and i want to rest in You.
life's too short for stress
and i have full access to You
so i just want to talk to You.
You live in me.
You're right here with me.
thank You.
without You, i'm nothing.
is it better to walk aimlessly
or to walk blind-folded/blind?
or is it the same?
you can see your aimless walking
but you can't see at all if you're blind
this faith talk
you feel blind but you have an aim, a clear goal.
but sometimes, you feel you're walking aimlessly.
but faith isn't about directions.
there's only one way. one truth. one life.
then you hear this blind faith talk
how you walk as if you know where you're going.
but you're blind. you don't really know or see anything.
"blind Christians. they don't even know what they believe in. such blind faith."
blind faith has become a more negative phrase. dictionary.com says blind faith means believing without true understanding.
but that IS faith. blind faith is faith. yes, there are many who know, understand, yet don't really believe. that's being blind.
faith is about believing even when you don't understand. being ignorant is easy. knowing is easy. believing in something you don't fully understand is not. but it is possible if you take the first step.
believing is the first step to believing over and over again because there will come many moments when understanding will not be possible or given. how can we understand the goodness, the Plans, the Glory of God? we can only believe. that's why we are called believers. so let's believe. true faith is blind faith. a faith that does not need to see to believe. a faith that doesn't just know but also believes and sees without actually seeing. blind faith is radical faith.
am i walking aimlessly?
am i blinded by my knowledge?
am i blinded by my habits?
am i blinded by my faith or what i think is faith?
am i believing?
am i lost?
where do i stand, Lord?
what do i want, Lord?
why do i need to decide
why must i pick and choose
when to me, clearly,
my only option is You.
knowing You leads to knowing me
knowing You leads to hating me
but loving You means loving me
because You love me, and i have humbly accepted that Love with fear and trembling.
Your love is too great, God.
Your love is beyond this world.
Your love is what i was created by.
Your love is what i was given.
how this truth soothes me, Lord.
how this truth heals me, Lord.
how this truth lifts me, Lord.
how this truth frees me, Lord.
You, Love, have created me, beloved,
to be loved and love.
You. love. me.
and i choose to receive that love.
You. let. me. choose.
freely. free.
in response to your love, i want to love You.
i want to love others
freely. free.
but this world abuses Your name.
love. sex. marriage, children.
everything's a joke, a game.
how You must hurt, Lord.
how You must turn your eyes away from this filthy land
that was once a secret garden You loved and in which You dwelled.
may i create a garden for You
where You remain in me and i in You
where there are shimmering streams of milk and honey
willow trees dancing gracefully at the sound of Your Name.
Jesus
won't You gently prune my branches and make me fruitful, Lord.
for every blessing You pour out i'll turn back to praise.
the secret garden is here in my heart.
Your glory is hidden in my heart.
Your beauty is hidden in my heart.
Heaven is here in my heart.
my heart does not know how blessed it is
to guard the Love that dwells in it.
my heart does not realize it dwells in a new creation, holy and pleasing to the Lord Most High.
my heart cannot fathom the great and unsearchable things it is about to witness in this world and eternity.
for my heart is too small..my understanding, too limited.
but may You expand it.
may you overflow to all those around me right now who need You...to my studies...to the world...
You are glorious.
You are so beautiful to me.
my Love. my Savior.
my Redeemer. my Friend.
the Overseer of my soul.
the Lifter of my head.
in Jesus' name i pray.
amen.
there is no reason, no way, no how...i'm still awake..still surviving this week.
i am experiencing major grace.
i found a good study spot today at norris...and i constantly had to remind myself that God was with me..that God was for me...and studying became a lot more enjoyable.
i had a short time of prayer and reflection...and wrote this behind my stats notes.
i plan to throw away all my stats notes, so i want to copy this down here.
and as i'm reminded of the thoughts that i believe God whispered to me...i will prepare my heart to speed-write this spanish essay. ahhh. i cannot wait until 2 o'clock.
at norris, wednesday afternoon:
Lord,
it's 4:14
and i want to rest in You.
life's too short for stress
and i have full access to You
so i just want to talk to You.
You live in me.
You're right here with me.
thank You.
without You, i'm nothing.
is it better to walk aimlessly
or to walk blind-folded/blind?
or is it the same?
you can see your aimless walking
but you can't see at all if you're blind
this faith talk
you feel blind but you have an aim, a clear goal.
but sometimes, you feel you're walking aimlessly.
but faith isn't about directions.
there's only one way. one truth. one life.
then you hear this blind faith talk
how you walk as if you know where you're going.
but you're blind. you don't really know or see anything.
"blind Christians. they don't even know what they believe in. such blind faith."
blind faith has become a more negative phrase. dictionary.com says blind faith means believing without true understanding.
but that IS faith. blind faith is faith. yes, there are many who know, understand, yet don't really believe. that's being blind.
faith is about believing even when you don't understand. being ignorant is easy. knowing is easy. believing in something you don't fully understand is not. but it is possible if you take the first step.
believing is the first step to believing over and over again because there will come many moments when understanding will not be possible or given. how can we understand the goodness, the Plans, the Glory of God? we can only believe. that's why we are called believers. so let's believe. true faith is blind faith. a faith that does not need to see to believe. a faith that doesn't just know but also believes and sees without actually seeing. blind faith is radical faith.
am i walking aimlessly?
am i blinded by my knowledge?
am i blinded by my habits?
am i blinded by my faith or what i think is faith?
am i believing?
am i lost?
where do i stand, Lord?
what do i want, Lord?
why do i need to decide
why must i pick and choose
when to me, clearly,
my only option is You.
knowing You leads to knowing me
knowing You leads to hating me
but loving You means loving me
because You love me, and i have humbly accepted that Love with fear and trembling.
Your love is too great, God.
Your love is beyond this world.
Your love is what i was created by.
Your love is what i was given.
how this truth soothes me, Lord.
how this truth heals me, Lord.
how this truth lifts me, Lord.
how this truth frees me, Lord.
You, Love, have created me, beloved,
to be loved and love.
You. love. me.
and i choose to receive that love.
You. let. me. choose.
freely. free.
in response to your love, i want to love You.
i want to love others
freely. free.
but this world abuses Your name.
love. sex. marriage, children.
everything's a joke, a game.
how You must hurt, Lord.
how You must turn your eyes away from this filthy land
that was once a secret garden You loved and in which You dwelled.
may i create a garden for You
where You remain in me and i in You
where there are shimmering streams of milk and honey
willow trees dancing gracefully at the sound of Your Name.
Jesus
won't You gently prune my branches and make me fruitful, Lord.
for every blessing You pour out i'll turn back to praise.
the secret garden is here in my heart.
Your glory is hidden in my heart.
Your beauty is hidden in my heart.
Heaven is here in my heart.
my heart does not know how blessed it is
to guard the Love that dwells in it.
my heart does not realize it dwells in a new creation, holy and pleasing to the Lord Most High.
my heart cannot fathom the great and unsearchable things it is about to witness in this world and eternity.
for my heart is too small..my understanding, too limited.
but may You expand it.
may you overflow to all those around me right now who need You...to my studies...to the world...
You are glorious.
You are so beautiful to me.
my Love. my Savior.
my Redeemer. my Friend.
the Overseer of my soul.
the Lifter of my head.
in Jesus' name i pray.
amen.
Monday, May 30, 2011
rewind n reflect
i went through all my blog entries.
waste of time? maybe.
but man...some posts surprised me.
i'm actually funny in some.
i sound kinda wise in others.
i sound crazy in many.
i'm very forgetful.
i'm young.
i'm broken.
i'm confused.
i'm hurt.
i'm rescued.
i'm redeemed.
i see growing pains here and there.
i see God's fingerprints everywhere.
this is the most loyal and faithful i've been to a blog...or so i call it "bloggie"
ahahahaha i hope God loves my lameness.
anyway,
God is good.
i'm pretty screwed for my final ipad project...
but there is a peace that transcends all understanding.
peace is definitely a gift of the Holy Spirit.
waste of time? maybe.
but man...some posts surprised me.
i'm actually funny in some.
i sound kinda wise in others.
i sound crazy in many.
i'm very forgetful.
i'm young.
i'm broken.
i'm confused.
i'm hurt.
i'm rescued.
i'm redeemed.
i see growing pains here and there.
i see God's fingerprints everywhere.
this is the most loyal and faithful i've been to a blog...or so i call it "bloggie"
ahahahaha i hope God loves my lameness.
anyway,
God is good.
i'm pretty screwed for my final ipad project...
but there is a peace that transcends all understanding.
peace is definitely a gift of the Holy Spirit.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Jesus
God...
i think you are showing me how much i lack.
and i really lack a lot.
really. i do.
i have nothing good but you.
apart from you i have no good thing.
and these days
for some reason
i feel really far from you
but i know you are near.
i know that i may stumble
but you will not let me fall.
because you are my rock that i cling on to
you are my fortress. you are my firm foundation.
these aren't just poetic words that sound or look pretty on paper.
these are metaphors that really reflect the greatness and truth of your character.
God..
i need your help.
i know you know me inside out.
you know me better than i will ever know myself.
and i am desperate for you.
God...please.
i don't even know what to ask for.
but i know that you know everything i need.
you give me everything i need before i even ask.
God...
please block my ears.
i keep hearing things that i hate.
i keep hearing things that anger me.
in my anger i do not want to sin.
but i know my thoughts are so fleshly...and so evil.
i do not want to fall in the trap of false humility.
i am not humble.
i am nothing.
i don't understand what you're trying to teach me.
but i'm going to apply everything that i've learned depending on what i know of you God.
i know you are good.
i know you are living.
i know you are loving.
i know you are faithful.
i know you are sovereign.
and i know you are huge.
you are beyond my imagination.
you are beyond my feelings.
you are beyond my words.
you are beyond my thoughts.
but Lord. i trust you.
i don't know how..
but with at least my lips and my fingers
i confess my devotion to you.
Lord...give me an undivided heart and undivided mind for you.
i don't want to be a wave
i don't want to be tossed back and forth by others.
and even more...by myself. by my flesh. by the lies that the evil one tries to insert in my mind.
i hate it so much.
i feel so hopeless when i know there is no need for me to be.
God...i need you so much.
everything is so ugly without you.
people...words....nature...myself.
everything is so ugly and imperfect without your touch.
without your breath of life.
Jesus...
breathe your breath of life in my ears.
in my heart.
help me to dance in the storm.
help me to dance in the wind.
help me to dance in the dark.
Jesus...
please.
i hate being swayed..to the right to the left.
so fickle i am.
so unattractive i am.
i disgust myself sometimes.
how prone i am to anger.
how prone i am to judging.
how prone i am to jealousy.
Jesus...
i know that i am not perfect.
but i notice so many imperfections around me.
the way people talk..
the selfishness...
the pride...
the self-obsession..
Lord..it BUGS ME SO MUCH.
and i don't want to judge
or be self-righteous.
that is only my foolishness.
but Lord.....please cover me in your holiness.
be my Shield.
rescue me from the wicked around me.
because it makes me so sad.
i need your light.
please shine your light above my head Jesus.
help me to feel your light..your hope.
even when i'm surrounded by darkness.
by people in darkness.
Lord...how can you love us?
how can you love your people who are so forgetful?
Lord...please give me your grace and strength to never forget your love for me.
Jesus...you are my only Hope.
you are the reason that i live.
if i forget this....i have no reason to live. i have no purpose to live. i am but dust. i am nothing.
but Lord...you have breathed into me the breath of life. from dust to heir of your kingdom. from dust to a heavenly being.
Lord...i am fearfully and wonderfully made.
you knit me in my mother's womb.
my body is your work of art.
my body is your temple.
you dwell in me, Lord.
you dwell in me, Jesus.
may your words never leave my heart.
may your words cover and cover the walls of this temple.
won't you reign.
won't you flow.
won't you go over, under, everywhere around this temple of mine.
Lord.....my heart is yours.
it is sick...it is deceitful...it is confused..it is broken.
but you are my healer.
and my heart is yours.
break my heart for what breaks yours.
but make it whole and bold for the work of your Hands.
use me Lord.
give me dreams...give me visions.
and fulfill them through me.
Lord....i feel so empty.
i feel like i have no dreams...no visions...no gifts..no voice....
but i have you.
why do i feel as if i lack?
change my heart o God...
change my heart....heal it.
Lord...fulfill your purpose in my life.
and allow me to keep my eyes on you.
i don't know where you are...how you are...why you are so Good....so Great....so loving....so true....
but You are.
you said I am.
and i say in response that You are. You will be.
so Lord...i am going to keep pressing on.
grant me the perseverance.
i love you.
i want to love you more.
i want to know you more.
you said that those who love God are known by God.
may i be known by you.
i don't want us to be awkward when i see you face to face.
i want us to celebrate...embrace....and rejoice.
i don't want to have my face hung low in shame.
but i want to look up to your light...and proclaim that you are the lifter of my head.
Lord...i don't know what to say.
i don't know what's wrong with me.
i don't know what's going on.
but Lord...i want to rejoice.
i want to rejoice in every circumstance.
i want to shout for joy.
i want to live victoriously just as you did.
because you are my victory.
Jesus....i love you so much.
with my little faith....i can somehow say that i love you.
but i'm just realizing how little my faith is...
and that makes me so sad.
grant me greater faith Lord...
that i may love you more!
Lord...i'll be humble.
i'll be mindful.
always always always
of your mercy.
i am going to trust in you, always.
i am going to rejoice in you, always.
i am going to hide your words in my heart, always.
i am going to sharpen my sword, always.
i am going to pray continually, always.
i am going to sing to you, always.
Lord.....
what else can i dooooooo
what else can i sayyyy?
i am too unworthy to even proclaim your name.
but thank you Jesus....that you washed me clean.
and made it possible for me to call out to you.
to reach out to you with my hands and heart lifted high.
thank you Jesus.
i am for you.
you are for me.
no one can be against me.
in the name of JESUS' LIVING NAME I PRAY.
AMEN.
i think you are showing me how much i lack.
and i really lack a lot.
really. i do.
i have nothing good but you.
apart from you i have no good thing.
and these days
for some reason
i feel really far from you
but i know you are near.
i know that i may stumble
but you will not let me fall.
because you are my rock that i cling on to
you are my fortress. you are my firm foundation.
these aren't just poetic words that sound or look pretty on paper.
these are metaphors that really reflect the greatness and truth of your character.
God..
i need your help.
i know you know me inside out.
you know me better than i will ever know myself.
and i am desperate for you.
God...please.
i don't even know what to ask for.
but i know that you know everything i need.
you give me everything i need before i even ask.
God...
please block my ears.
i keep hearing things that i hate.
i keep hearing things that anger me.
in my anger i do not want to sin.
but i know my thoughts are so fleshly...and so evil.
i do not want to fall in the trap of false humility.
i am not humble.
i am nothing.
i don't understand what you're trying to teach me.
but i'm going to apply everything that i've learned depending on what i know of you God.
i know you are good.
i know you are living.
i know you are loving.
i know you are faithful.
i know you are sovereign.
and i know you are huge.
you are beyond my imagination.
you are beyond my feelings.
you are beyond my words.
you are beyond my thoughts.
but Lord. i trust you.
i don't know how..
but with at least my lips and my fingers
i confess my devotion to you.
Lord...give me an undivided heart and undivided mind for you.
i don't want to be a wave
i don't want to be tossed back and forth by others.
and even more...by myself. by my flesh. by the lies that the evil one tries to insert in my mind.
i hate it so much.
i feel so hopeless when i know there is no need for me to be.
God...i need you so much.
everything is so ugly without you.
people...words....nature...myself.
everything is so ugly and imperfect without your touch.
without your breath of life.
Jesus...
breathe your breath of life in my ears.
in my heart.
help me to dance in the storm.
help me to dance in the wind.
help me to dance in the dark.
Jesus...
please.
i hate being swayed..to the right to the left.
so fickle i am.
so unattractive i am.
i disgust myself sometimes.
how prone i am to anger.
how prone i am to judging.
how prone i am to jealousy.
Jesus...
i know that i am not perfect.
but i notice so many imperfections around me.
the way people talk..
the selfishness...
the pride...
the self-obsession..
Lord..it BUGS ME SO MUCH.
and i don't want to judge
or be self-righteous.
that is only my foolishness.
but Lord.....please cover me in your holiness.
be my Shield.
rescue me from the wicked around me.
because it makes me so sad.
i need your light.
please shine your light above my head Jesus.
help me to feel your light..your hope.
even when i'm surrounded by darkness.
by people in darkness.
Lord...how can you love us?
how can you love your people who are so forgetful?
Lord...please give me your grace and strength to never forget your love for me.
Jesus...you are my only Hope.
you are the reason that i live.
if i forget this....i have no reason to live. i have no purpose to live. i am but dust. i am nothing.
but Lord...you have breathed into me the breath of life. from dust to heir of your kingdom. from dust to a heavenly being.
Lord...i am fearfully and wonderfully made.
you knit me in my mother's womb.
my body is your work of art.
my body is your temple.
you dwell in me, Lord.
you dwell in me, Jesus.
may your words never leave my heart.
may your words cover and cover the walls of this temple.
won't you reign.
won't you flow.
won't you go over, under, everywhere around this temple of mine.
Lord.....my heart is yours.
it is sick...it is deceitful...it is confused..it is broken.
but you are my healer.
and my heart is yours.
break my heart for what breaks yours.
but make it whole and bold for the work of your Hands.
use me Lord.
give me dreams...give me visions.
and fulfill them through me.
Lord....i feel so empty.
i feel like i have no dreams...no visions...no gifts..no voice....
but i have you.
why do i feel as if i lack?
change my heart o God...
change my heart....heal it.
Lord...fulfill your purpose in my life.
and allow me to keep my eyes on you.
i don't know where you are...how you are...why you are so Good....so Great....so loving....so true....
but You are.
you said I am.
and i say in response that You are. You will be.
so Lord...i am going to keep pressing on.
grant me the perseverance.
i love you.
i want to love you more.
i want to know you more.
you said that those who love God are known by God.
may i be known by you.
i don't want us to be awkward when i see you face to face.
i want us to celebrate...embrace....and rejoice.
i don't want to have my face hung low in shame.
but i want to look up to your light...and proclaim that you are the lifter of my head.
Lord...i don't know what to say.
i don't know what's wrong with me.
i don't know what's going on.
but Lord...i want to rejoice.
i want to rejoice in every circumstance.
i want to shout for joy.
i want to live victoriously just as you did.
because you are my victory.
Jesus....i love you so much.
with my little faith....i can somehow say that i love you.
but i'm just realizing how little my faith is...
and that makes me so sad.
grant me greater faith Lord...
that i may love you more!
Lord...i'll be humble.
i'll be mindful.
always always always
of your mercy.
i am going to trust in you, always.
i am going to rejoice in you, always.
i am going to hide your words in my heart, always.
i am going to sharpen my sword, always.
i am going to pray continually, always.
i am going to sing to you, always.
Lord.....
what else can i dooooooo
what else can i sayyyy?
i am too unworthy to even proclaim your name.
but thank you Jesus....that you washed me clean.
and made it possible for me to call out to you.
to reach out to you with my hands and heart lifted high.
thank you Jesus.
i am for you.
you are for me.
no one can be against me.
in the name of JESUS' LIVING NAME I PRAY.
AMEN.
Friday, April 8, 2011
i love you Jesus
i am tired of inconsistency.
i am tired of bipolarity.
may your yes be yes
may your no be no
may your hi's be hi's
may your bye's be bye's
may your truths be truths
may your lies be lies
don't mix me up
keep me in then out of your life
am i not human?
i am too human. so are you.
can we think before we act?
or are we thinking too much that we aren't even acting?
your actions hurt.
but inactions hurt more.
why do i care?
why can't i let go?
it's not like i care.
lie.
i care.
but i don't know anymore.
i am tired of inconsistency.
i am tired of bipolarity.
that's why i love Jesus.
i am tired of bipolarity.
may your yes be yes
may your no be no
may your hi's be hi's
may your bye's be bye's
may your truths be truths
may your lies be lies
don't mix me up
keep me in then out of your life
am i not human?
i am too human. so are you.
can we think before we act?
or are we thinking too much that we aren't even acting?
your actions hurt.
but inactions hurt more.
why do i care?
why can't i let go?
it's not like i care.
lie.
i care.
but i don't know anymore.
i am tired of inconsistency.
i am tired of bipolarity.
that's why i love Jesus.
when
you are busy that you live off of granola bars
you are lonely and korean dramas or shows are useless
you cry more, not that you're sad, but you have more tears
you notice the flaws of others and stop yourself because you see them in you, too
you read your past blog entries and want to delete them
you see old friends and old relationships and can't do much but sigh
you realize more and more that heaven is a good place to be even though you're young and healthy on earth
you feel a little older..
you are lonely and korean dramas or shows are useless
you cry more, not that you're sad, but you have more tears
you notice the flaws of others and stop yourself because you see them in you, too
you read your past blog entries and want to delete them
you see old friends and old relationships and can't do much but sigh
you realize more and more that heaven is a good place to be even though you're young and healthy on earth
you feel a little older..
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
peli...dgadkjga
presentation wasn't that bad.
i guess i'm better at talking than writing.
maybe i should write the way i talk.
i tried to be funny
to break the ice
i pronounced "pelicula" as "pecilculicula"
...
no one laughed.
oh one person.
me.
sheeeeeesh.
i guess i'm better at talking than writing.
maybe i should write the way i talk.
i tried to be funny
to break the ice
i pronounced "pelicula" as "pecilculicula"
...
no one laughed.
oh one person.
me.
sheeeeeesh.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
beautiful
You are my everyday.
You are my forever.
Everything is about you, and somehow, this makes me whole.
You are my forever.
Everything is about you, and somehow, this makes me whole.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
numbers
i'm not trying to be funny.
but i guess i'm really not good with numbers.
even the book of the Bible.
i feel so bad.
i like...skimmed through the tribe and name parts.
and i know every word is so precious.
but man...
THAT WAS HARD.
i will read it again after i finish the Bible this year.
i promise, Lord.
I WILL READ NUMBERS AGAIN.
I PROMISE.
but i guess i'm really not good with numbers.
even the book of the Bible.
i feel so bad.
i like...skimmed through the tribe and name parts.
and i know every word is so precious.
but man...
THAT WAS HARD.
i will read it again after i finish the Bible this year.
i promise, Lord.
I WILL READ NUMBERS AGAIN.
I PROMISE.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
while thinking of mom
i love you.
i'd choose
to hear your laughter over the loveliest love song
to see your smile over the funniest movie with my favorite celebrity
to smell your clean pajama shirt over the sweetest perfume
to hold your hand over the prettiest designer purse
i choose to love you.
and i love you, i do.
i'd choose
to hear your laughter over the loveliest love song
to see your smile over the funniest movie with my favorite celebrity
to smell your clean pajama shirt over the sweetest perfume
to hold your hand over the prettiest designer purse
i choose to love you.
and i love you, i do.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
s.o.c
i'm not satisfied.
and only You can satisify.
keep refining me under your Holy Fire.
of love, promise, hope, victory, freedom
keep melting this cold heart, burning
with passion for your Name.
it hurts, but i want to burn for You.
i want to shine Your Light.
i have nothing to offer you but this heart.
this heart has nothing good but you.
so take it, Lord.
only you can transform it.
use me, Lord.
change me, Lord.
i know i'm unworthy, but you have called me worthy.
you call me your child. you carry me in your arms.
lead me gently with your holy staff...
i follow you....i want to follow you forever and forever.
and only You can satisify.
keep refining me under your Holy Fire.
of love, promise, hope, victory, freedom
keep melting this cold heart, burning
with passion for your Name.
it hurts, but i want to burn for You.
i want to shine Your Light.
i have nothing to offer you but this heart.
this heart has nothing good but you.
so take it, Lord.
only you can transform it.
use me, Lord.
change me, Lord.
i know i'm unworthy, but you have called me worthy.
you call me your child. you carry me in your arms.
lead me gently with your holy staff...
i follow you....i want to follow you forever and forever.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Jesus
i need You....
now, our God, hear the prayers and petitions of your servant.
for your sake, o Lord, look with favor on your desolate sanctuary.
give ear, o God, and hear; open your eyes and see the desolation of the city that bears your Name.
we do not make requests of you because we are righteous, but because of your great mercy.
o Lord, listen! o Lord, forgive! o Lord, hear and act!
for you sake, o my God, do not delay, because your city and your people people bear your Name.
-daniel's prayer...and mine.
now, our God, hear the prayers and petitions of your servant.
for your sake, o Lord, look with favor on your desolate sanctuary.
give ear, o God, and hear; open your eyes and see the desolation of the city that bears your Name.
we do not make requests of you because we are righteous, but because of your great mercy.
o Lord, listen! o Lord, forgive! o Lord, hear and act!
for you sake, o my God, do not delay, because your city and your people people bear your Name.
-daniel's prayer...and mine.
Monday, January 31, 2011
prayer
Lord,
i want to have the humility and boldness of your servant Moses.
Lord,
i want to be like Moses.
Lord,
i want to know You more.
in Jesus' name.
love,
ashley
i want to have the humility and boldness of your servant Moses.
Lord,
i want to be like Moses.
Lord,
i want to know You more.
in Jesus' name.
love,
ashley
Sunday, January 23, 2011
no greater love
예수님만을 더욱 사랑 날이 갈수록 더욱 사랑
고난이 와도 더욱 사랑 내 삶의 고백 더욱 사랑
주님 한 분만 더욱 사랑 그 무엇보다 더욱 사랑
그 누구보다 더욱 사랑 내 영의 고백 더욱 사랑
나 사는 동안 더욱 사랑 숨질 때에도 더욱 사랑
저 천국에서 더욱 사랑 신부의 고백 더욱 사랑
He calls us His Bride.
click here.
고난이 와도 더욱 사랑 내 삶의 고백 더욱 사랑
주님 한 분만 더욱 사랑 그 무엇보다 더욱 사랑
그 누구보다 더욱 사랑 내 영의 고백 더욱 사랑
나 사는 동안 더욱 사랑 숨질 때에도 더욱 사랑
저 천국에서 더욱 사랑 신부의 고백 더욱 사랑
He calls us His Bride.
click here.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
beautiful
"raise me up, from this grave
touch my tongue, and then i’ll sing
heal my limbs, and joyfully, i’ll run to You."
- DCB, You’re Everything
only You can free a doubtful mind
and melt a cold stone heart.
touch my tongue, and then i’ll sing
heal my limbs, and joyfully, i’ll run to You."
- DCB, You’re Everything
only You can free a doubtful mind
and melt a cold stone heart.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Shield
"Then the angel of God, who had been traveling in front of Israel's army, withdrew and went behind them.
The pillar of cloud also moved from in front and stood behind them, coming between the armies of Egypt and Israel.
Throughout the night the cloud brought darkness to the one side and light to the other side;
so neither went near the other all night long." - Exodus 14:19-20
The pillar of cloud also moved from in front and stood behind them, coming between the armies of Egypt and Israel.
Throughout the night the cloud brought darkness to the one side and light to the other side;
so neither went near the other all night long." - Exodus 14:19-20
Monday, January 10, 2011
Free
Jesus, apart from You i have no good thing
Jesus, apart from You i can't do anything
Jesus, you are so good so good to me
this is the truth of life that sets me free.
Jesus, You are the Truth that sets me free.
Jesus, apart from You i have no good thing
Jesus, apart from You i can't do anything
Jesus, You are my all, my everything
this is the truth of life that sets me free
Jesus, You're all i have i want i need
the waves of the world come, crash into my flesh
i sing through the storm, in You i find sweet rest
You split the sea, You make the Way for me.
this is the truth of life that sets me free.
Jesus, You are the Way my soul can see.
Jesus, apart from you i have no good thing
Jesus, apart from you i can't do anything
Jesus, you are my Shield, my Victory
this is the truth of life that sets me free
Jesus, You are alive You live in me.
Jesus, apart from You i can't do anything
Jesus, you are so good so good to me
this is the truth of life that sets me free.
Jesus, You are the Truth that sets me free.
Jesus, apart from You i have no good thing
Jesus, apart from You i can't do anything
Jesus, You are my all, my everything
this is the truth of life that sets me free
Jesus, You're all i have i want i need
the waves of the world come, crash into my flesh
i sing through the storm, in You i find sweet rest
You split the sea, You make the Way for me.
this is the truth of life that sets me free.
Jesus, You are the Way my soul can see.
Jesus, apart from you i have no good thing
Jesus, apart from you i can't do anything
Jesus, you are my Shield, my Victory
this is the truth of life that sets me free
Jesus, You are alive You live in me.
Saturday, January 8, 2011
first plague
God is crazy...
He can do anything....
I am reading about the first plague..
and can't imagine...the look...the smell...
of the blood in the Nile...
we must fear the Lord.
always.
we must love the Lord.
always.
we must worship the Lord.
always.
worship= fear plus love.
He can do anything....
I am reading about the first plague..
and can't imagine...the look...the smell...
of the blood in the Nile...
we must fear the Lord.
always.
we must love the Lord.
always.
we must worship the Lord.
always.
worship= fear plus love.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
you think i can do it?
a voice.
many voices in my head.
you're not ready.
i'm not ready.
i don't wanna leave.
i don't wanna go.
it's going to be hard.
but one voice..
one whisper.
calm.
in the back of head,
says everything is going to be okay.
i just need to trust.
i just need to believe.
and reminds me...
that it's in these moments..
when i feel the most unready.
uncertain, unsure.
is when He works through me the most.
so i anticipate.
i may be shy to express it..
but i'm excited and expectant.
for your Light to shine through.
happy 2011!
many voices in my head.
you're not ready.
i'm not ready.
i don't wanna leave.
i don't wanna go.
it's going to be hard.
but one voice..
one whisper.
calm.
in the back of head,
says everything is going to be okay.
i just need to trust.
i just need to believe.
and reminds me...
that it's in these moments..
when i feel the most unready.
uncertain, unsure.
is when He works through me the most.
so i anticipate.
i may be shy to express it..
but i'm excited and expectant.
for your Light to shine through.
happy 2011!
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